prehistoric Daze
The year is 4,4668,234,263,002 B.C.E.
“Hey Ren,” says Wendel.
“Sup?”
“Dude, Get this shit. I was working last night, delivering a pizza, when I had to take a left turn… Well, I happened to be holding a drink while I was making the turn at the time. But I couldn’t get a good grip on the steering wheel while holding the drink; I tried making the turn without spilling any of it but what happened was I ran the front left of the car into a curb and ended up spilling the cup of water all over myself.”
Ren boasted laughing.
“Yeah, it sounds pretty funny now… But I had to leave the car deserted in a parking lot. I couldn’t figure out how to change the tire so I just left it and went to eat at Pizza Hut.” He stopped talking.
“What did you order?”
“Pizza, what the fuck do you think?” he said.
Just then Ren and Wendel went zooming off in their domed Magic Carpet. Teleportating in the way it happened at the time. Ren had been a bit agitated with Wendel lately since Wendel was pleading Ren to have him sleep on top of his syringes. They were living in a Halfway Cave at the time… and Wendel knew that mostly everyone at the place wouldn’t suspect Ren of using dope. He didn’t mind at first, since the needles were usually under the mattress. But it became distressing for him, since he would have rather placed books there instead.
“I was thinking you might’ve gotten cheesy bread. It’s pretty good.”
When they made it back to their place, Mazon was asleep on the couch. He had fallen asleep to watching Cheers.
Ren laughed, “Look, he’s watching Nick at Nite.”
Wendel didn’t understand.
Suddenly, Mazon woke up in a fiery. “Don’t touch my Doritos!” Glaring his eyes at Ren.
“I would not do such a thing, Mazon,” Ren said.
The three cavemen walked outside for a smoke break.
“I would like to fight Venny in the Pool,” said Mazon sternly.
“How come?” replied Ren.
“He is always leaving his Parcheesi game pieces all over the living room. And he leaves all sorts of junk in the front yard.”
Ren took notice of this. Wendel stood around idly.
“See that chair there,” said Mazon. “He brought it here last weekend for some frat house party. I’m just about to fire it into the pool!”
Wendel and Ren were definitely cracking up by this point.
But Mazon was very serious.
“I’m serious,” he said. “I’ll fire it into the pool.”
(which means to be thrown…)
“Don’t do that. We could use that chair,” replied Ren. “We could put it on the back porch.”
“Fuck that. I’m through with it. Oh, not to mention the Air Conditioner. I’m about to throw it out the window.”
“Good Idea.” Ren said.
Mazon and Wendel went upstairs to one of the guest rooms. Ren stood around in the front yard waiting for it to be dropped. Mazon shouted down to him a few times, telling him how far into the process of unscrewing the thing they were. And all of a sudden, the air conditioner fell right down onto the front porch; making a very loud sound.
And later they found out how heavy it was to move. So it stayed there for months.
The End.
